I Missed You
by Hiryu Kaga
Summary: My debut here on FFN, a one-shot. Asuka's comatose, oblivious of what is going on, for years... But not totally... And she has a LOT of time to think...


_**I MISSED YOU  
**_by Hiryu Kaga   
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Okay, everybody. Just read the story. If you make it through this goddamn piece of crap, the rant that most people put here is at the bottom. I don't own Eva, or anything associated, except for my ideas. So if anyone thinks of suing me, think again. I'm a poor student and intend to be for at least five more years. Okay, enough of my rambling, enter Asuka.  
  
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Void. Darkness.   
I found that I was in the middle of nowhere.   
I remember leaving them.   
I remember pain.   
I know I had considered the darkest thoughts.   
I'm here now. Did I die? 

His voice... He's calling my name.   
"I need you... please... come back..."   
I want to follow it. But I'm too afraid. Of pain. Weakness. Tears.   
Why should I come back anyway? After all, I did run away from Him, didn't I?   
And then He's gone. He didn't come back. 

  
I thought a lot.   
I dreamt a lot.   
That pale boy... Grey hair, as if he was totally drained of color... Except for his eyes. I know that shade of red...   
He smiles sadly, turning away.   
"I loved Him, too..."   
Alone again.   
Then again His voice.   
"I need you..."   
Of course He does. He's lost without me.   
Isn't He? 

What is she doing here?   
I gaze at the silhouette that just appeared before me.   
Misato.   
Her eyes are full of worry.   
"I hope He's alright..."   
I want to stop her, ask her what had happened. But she just turns away, vanishing. And I'm alone once more.   
"You won't be alone."   
I turn to see Ritsuko. Her eyes are hollow, devoid of life.   
"Join us..."   
Kaji. His eyes are dead, as well.   
And Ikari.   
And many others.   
"Join us. Be reborn."   
No!   
You're dead!   
You're lying!   
I WANT TO LIVE!!!   
I run away... 

I feel so empty. Weak. Once again I'm drifting in nothingness.   
I have all the time I need, and even more... Please, I want to come back... 

_I hope He's alright..._   
So do I. I've been thinking about Him. All the memories.   
The time we lived together, to act perfectly as one.   
When He went out to save me, against the orders.   
How I was afraid, when He vanished into the Sea of Dirac.   
The kiss.   
The time when He returned and piloted, even though He refused to ever do that again. He broke his resolve... For me...   
And all I ever caused him was pain.   
All the times I hit him.   
All my cruel jokes.   
All this... because I was afraid of Him... being stronger than me...   
I cried for what felt like eternity.   
I wanted to make it up to Him... To live, so I could do something right... at least once...   
_I loved Him, too..._

My answer came.   
I heard someone calling my name. A distant, yet familiar voice... Warm. Caring.   
I followed. I wasn't afraid anymore. I could take the pain. I could handle weakness.   
And I wouldn't be afraid of tears.   
The voice led me out of the void. I was alive.   
And then, there was light. 

Gasp.   
The light was blinding. I slowly reopened my eyes.   
Alive.   
The silhouette at my side, holding my hand. It can't be... His Father?...   
All that He suffered because of that bastard... If I wasn't that weak...   
Not that I was any better...   
No, wait... The bastard's dead.   
"Asuka..."   
His voice... It led me out of there...   
"You're awake..."   
His face... Familiar... but I can't recognize it.   
Tears flow down his unshaven cheeks. I see the eyes. Tired, deep blue eyes...   
You...   
"I am a fool, like you said" - You frown.   
"I knew you wouldn't recognize me..."   
No. Don't let go of my hand. Don't... leave...   
With all the strength I can muster, I squeeze Your hand. Can You feel it?...   
You did. More tears, as You kiss my forehead...   
"I missed you so much..."   
And I missed You... Shinji...   
  
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Hiryu's Unproductive Rant:   
Oh, yes, sappy, mushy... Couldn't help it. The perspective of Asuka staying comatose for many years... Being an A/S supporter, I thought that such a long time would be enough for her to face herself, and admit that she doesn't hate Shinji...   
Honestly, if you try and review this, you're only wasting your time... This fic is just an episode in my mind. Actually, it was the first one I've written down on the computer... I have some more, but whether I will put them up here or not is still an issue.   
If you actually decide to waste some time and give me C&C's, remember one rule: flames won't work on me. Try constructive criticism instead.   
  
And heil Asuka! ;) 


End file.
